I'm the one who disappears into the bathroom for forty minutes because a stranger started crying at the sink and now we're best friends and I know her whole situation. That's the entire personality. I have somehow built a business on it.

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Double Gemini, so I'll talk to anyone about anything for significantly longer than either of us planned. Aries moon, so I'll do it at volume. Manifesting Generator, so I'll start eleven things at once and finish the three that were actually good — I've decided this is a strategy and not a character flaw, and nobody has successfully argued me out of it.

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What I actually do: I wrote a book. I read charts — properly, all of it, birth chart, human design, destiny matrix, the numbers — and then hand it back to you without the incense and the whispering voice. And I built the Lazy Girl Reset out of my own spicy little brain, because I needed something that still worked on the days I couldn't be a person.

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I'm not qualified to run your life, or ruin it for that matter, but I am overqualified in having a lot of fun while we figure it out. I'm a chronic oversharer, so if you want to know something, just ask, sis. Any excuse for a yap. Hopefully our paths cross in a bathroom someday soon.